Safer in bed

SQUEEZING back tears, I convinced myself that my legs were still attached to my torso.

I’d been sandboarding down the beautiful dunes of Stradbroke Island and had been doing quite well until I tried to disembark like everyone else (read: without eating sand).

I should have recalled the misadventures caused by previous assumptions that my gangly, awkward limbs would operate in a sensible and practical fashion.

They never do.

Anyway, I tried to get off my board – which had picked up quite a pace – but while one foot made it onto the sand, the other refused to leave the board.

Subsequently, I executed a manoeuvre that is otherwise known as “the splits”.

My partner and the instructor rushed to my side as I tried very hard not to cry.

Being the trooper that I am, tears are strictly reserved for severed arteries, broken bones and the day before pay-day when I can’t afford chocolate.

But I was able to walk away from this incident, which makes me very brave.

Well, I was, until the wee hours of the next morning when my painful knee would not be moved and my toes began to get pins and needles.

Visions of amputation danced through my head.

“I think I may need to go to the hospital,” I whimpered after weighing up the emergency ward waiting list on a Sunday morning.

I don’t remember the exact muffled response I got from a still-comatose body under the blankets, but it went along the lines of “no medical attention… just a sprain… what’ll you be like when you’re having a baby?”

Lucky for him he was right.

He’d never have lived it down if I’d suffered a serious injury.

Four days later I have a barely visible limp and can almost sleep with my leg completely straight, something I never thought I’d miss.

I did visit a physio who speculated I may have “popped out” my knee joint momentarily. Uh-huh, you’re feeling my pain now, right?

But for the record, it was very fun and in the 12-odd years of operating, the sand boarding people have only ever seen three accidents.

Just goes to show: a lucky girl, I ain’t.

 

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